It's coming...

It had been deathly quiet for a long time.  In fact, as Steve inched his way forward in the darkness, alert to even the gentlest whisper, he wondered if he had even heard a noise at all.  He crept on, straining to distinguish any foreign sound from that made by his cloth-wrapped feet along the dungeon corridor.  He froze.  Was that the sand beneath his feet, or a manila envelope tearing open in the inky blackness? 

FLASH!  A strobe of burning light exploded in his face, blinding him almost instantly.  Almost…for in that split-second he saw a wild Wizards Mutants Laser Pistols Issue #3 lunging for his neck, then felt the cold metal of its exposed staple binding bite into his jugular.

…

Don’t be like Steve (for real, don’t be like Steve).  Be prepared when the new issue of your favorite fanzine of old school weirdness comes out this month.